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Chapter 54. Seduction |
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ew glistened on the rolled chamomile lawn and in the warm golden light of a summer morning he awakened to bliss. The apple sweet scent of the herb curled into his consciousness, as familiar and longed for as a comfortable bed after a long journey. A strange sense of relief vied with a familiar sense of dread. Flopping onto his back he gazed up at a deep blue sky and watched a pair of swallows effortlessly dance and dive. Grunting to his feet, he surveyed the familiar flow of the lawn down to the brook and the edge of the forest then moved instinctively toward the weathered stone of the house where he had been born. It was a phantom of an innocent time, its gray blocks padded with moss and bursts of flaking lichen. Two floors rose above the carefully tended garden and there was honeysuckle entwined with an ironwork trellis up to the balcony of his parents' room. Ernest was crooning raspily to himself on the sunny south side of the house as he trimmed back the rose hedge that perfumed the air outside of Pendaran’s bedroom window. The grizzled gardener nodded respectfully at him and continued about his work. He was the eldest resident on the estate and had lived there longer than any of them. Seeing him back in his old element gave Pendaran pause. He must be dreaming for he had seen the blasted ruins of his ancestral home. And yet the smells and sounds were as he remembered them. The weathered flags of the path and wisteria cascading over the arbor of the east terrace were exactly as they had been. He stood on the terrace outside the grand double doors near the place where he had been wed to Clarissa Ermengarde on another summer day very much like this one. For a moment he felt again the carefree joy of that moment. The future had been bright and full of promise. On that day as a wedding gift, his father Dylon had proclaimed Pendaran the rightful heir in an unusual display of fondness for his least favorite son. It was a sign that his grief was finally fading two years after Owain had been slain in the Guild Wars. The door groaned open and Clarissa’s golden figure stood at the top of the low steps, a smile dimpling her delicate cheeks. Once more he wondered why she had loved him of all the young men in the academy. He was neither the richest nor cleverest, and he was not even exceedingly handsome against the backdrop of his classmates. When he had been asked to leave, his first thought was of losing her. He was a failed scholar, but now it hardly mattered. Seeing her wearing his wedding band was a constant reminder of his good fortune. He had never felt worthy of her but now that no longer mattered. “You got up early,” she laughed, “and I was rather disappointed.” “You were so beautiful I hated to wake you.” “Come here, I want a kiss and then you will do my bidding in bed.” Her words made his body burn with desire. Strong women were like liquor. Giddy with happiness he gathered her into his arms, kissing her until both of them were breathless and trembling. How he had missed her over the long lonely span of years and the gulf of death. “I thought I’d lost you,” he croaked as she drew him inside, her grip tight and possessive. “Nonsense,” she giggled, “Do you think for a moment I’d let you go?” “No, of course not, beloved.” She closed the bedroom door behind them and began releasing the ivory buttons of his waistcoat. An ecstatic surge of heat drew him back against the wall where he trembled as she undressed and caressed him. “Missed you,” he gasped, knowing he would lose control soon and he no longer cared. He needed this as a starving man needed food. “No more pain, my love, just let go,” she breathed, her lips soft as raindrops on his face and throat, “Just let go. Let me take your nightmares away.” “Not real,” he murmured, doubt lurking beneath his frisson of lust and longing. “Does it matter, my love? What could be more real than me and my love for you?” “I’ve missed you so much,” he wept, “Gods, Clare, I missed you, but I know you died. Living without you was hell. The Searing was hell.” “Shh, Pen, it’s over now. We have all of eternity together.” “But I don’t want to die now. I can’t.” “Do you no longer love me?” “O Clare, please, of course I never stopped loving you. It wounds me that you think that.” “Then make love to me,” she pleaded, “We have each other in this moment.” “He has found your weakness. Fight him.” “Can’t. Oh gods, I can’t take much more. This is better than the pain. I am alone and trapped. No one is coming for me.” The honey sweetness of Clarissa’s lips mingled with the bitterness of his misery. She drew him into bed, the silkiness of her skin like the softest summer breeze curling over his strained flesh. Was this so wrong after what he had been through? “That’s right,” she soothed, “just let go. I’ll make it all better.” |
