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Chapter 55. On Edge |
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rigit’s tossing and turning drew him awake. He blinked into the darkness of a strange room and the unfamiliar smell of freshly laundered linens. He had reached a point of exhaustion so profound he had crawled into bed and gone immediately to sleep without waiting for Brigit to join him. “What time is it?” Armand grumbled, still feeling completely drained of all but anger. “It’s about an hour before dawn. I thought you were asleep.” “You’re like bedding down with an eel,” he complained. “I’m not having any fun either.” “How’s your friend?” he asked, not really interested but deciding to change the tone of the conversation. He could sense Brigit’s tension and a brewing storm of anger and he was in no mood to deal with it. “Terrible. I wish I’d stayed here. My mother was right.” “Right about what?” “About having a duty to protect others because the gods don’t give their gifts lightly.” Armand snorted disdainfully. “What?” she demanded. “I don’t bother with the gods and hopefully they have the courtesy not to bother with me.” “That’s blasphemy,” she growled. Armand rolled his eyes and turned his back to her. “So what if it is?” “Armie!” “You think the gods give a care about you or me or any of us? And even if they did, how is that comforting? According to the stories, we’re their tools. I just pray I rolled off the workbench and out of sight. Let some other poor fool get used by them for a change.” “Whatever would my parents say?” she moaned, turning her back to him now and taking most of the blankets with her. It was a sultry night, but his suddenly exposed flesh recoiled from the cool air flowing through the open window. “The same way they always do, with a fight.” “Stop making fun of my parents! They’re not stupid, you know. Just because they’re warriors doesn’t mean they’re barbarians. You probably think I’m stupid, too.” “Brigit, I never said that…” “No, but you’re thinking it.” “I am not,” he snapped, “So you’re suddenly a mesmer now?” “Like I’d want to be. You’re all a bunch of stuck up prats who believe you should be waited on hand and foot.” Armand opened his mouth to respond, then sighed and lay still. Why were they arguing like this? The bed quivered and soft hiccoughs of grief escaped from Brigit’s lips. Feeling like a heel, he rolled and tentatively placed a hand on her shoulder. She recoiled from his touch. “Leave me alone!” “Brigit, look… I’m sorry.” “Why were you such a jerk to Master Bei? Teleri thinks you’re a monster now because you resisted helping her child and husband. And then you had to go make a ruckus about giving Belenus a decent funeral. What were you thinking?” “Mog is my friend. He is family to me. Belenus was still his brother and leaving his corpse out to rot was wrong.” “They would have cremated…” “Brigit, please, let’s not fight. Maybe I was a little harsh. Things are strained here and I’m on edge.” “You’re on edge?” Brigit echoed him bitterly, “At least you aren’t the one wondering if your second spouse isn’t going to die an even more horrible death than the first. You are so selfish I wonder why I ever found you attractive.” Her words burned into his psyche and he felt a helpless lurch of fear that she no longer loved him. “Brigit, I’m sorry,” he babbled like a frightened child, biting back the words that would give away his vulnerability, “Don’t leave me, please.” “She’s lost,” Brigit sobbed, “I couldn’t console her no matter what I said. When Rhys died I worried she might crack but somehow she held herself together. And you know the worst part? All I could think about was what I’d do if I lost you? How would I feel if all of my happiness and hope were taken from me by one cruel senseless act? And how would I feel if that act were as a result of someone I loved and trusted?” “I’d go mad, too,” he whispered. “I vowed to her once that I would never let anyone harm Pen and I have failed over and over again to make good on that promise. Of course she won’t listen to me and she has to have figured out you’re now my greatest concern. And well, Pen can just rot because you’ve decided it’s time to chase after Mog.” “I have to go back to Cantha to meet up with Pirunel…” “Mog will be ransomed,” Brigit snapped angrily, “He’ll be fine. Teleri needs me to go help find Pen.” “He’s dead. Bei’s wife said as much.” “I will not give up on Pen until Zhou does.” “I’m not going on another of Bei’s pointless errands. I am going to Cantha.” “Fine,” Brigit snapped in a voice that implied anything but, “You do that, and while you’re there maybe you can figure out which of Pirunel’s girls would be more suitable for your needs.” “Brigit…” “No, you go back to the circus because gods know, that’s what they intended for you once you fell off their work bench.” To his horror she pounced out of bed and hurled her pillow at him. Stunned, he remained speechless until the door slammed behind her and he was left alone in their guest room. |
